Tex the Pontificator

Roger Pielke reports on Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change head Rajendra Pachauri proclaiming on reducing consumption on the West:

Hotel guests should have their electricity monitored; hefty aviation taxes should be introduced to deter people from flying; and iced water in restaurants should be curtailed . . . .

With busybodies such as he running our lives, what could go wrong?

The greenies begrudge the ice in your water,
Because of their fear the world’s getting hotter.
They want you cut back; your consumption’s excessive,
And they cannot see that they’re highly obsessive.

Their focus on detail is what’s so alarming.
They’ll make you live on subsistence farming.
Prosperity hinders collectivist visions,
And their plan for you is abject submission.

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Labels: doggerel, global warming

MadKane has a post calling Joe Lieberman a traitor to the Democratic Party for his opposition to the so-called public-option part of Obamacare. Her characterization misses an important fact: Lieberman isn't a Democrat anymore. The voters of Connecticut denied him the Democratic nomination. In effect, the Democratic Party kicked him out. How can you be a traitor to an organization that you not only no longer belong to, but one that kicked you out?

According to Madeleine Kane,
Lieberman’s a traitor profane,
But the Dems kicked him out,
And now they just pout
That his seat the man still retained.

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Labels: Congress, doggerel, Obamacare

My eye caught this sentence in an article on Climaquiddick:

In a statement welcomed by climate change sceptics, the university said it would make all the data accessible as soon as possible, once its Climatic Research Unit (CRU) had negotiated its release from a range of non-publication agreements.

I must disclaim any knowledge of British law, but I have some experience with Texas public information laws. This sounds ridiculous to me. Surely British law does not permit an entity otherwise subject to public disclosure requirements to evade the requirements by private contract. Otherwise public entities could, and no doubt would, evade public disclosure entirely.

I have often had opposing parties attempt to insert confidentiality clauses into contracts with public entities. Under Texas law, their choice is to acquiesce in legally mandated disclosure or walk away from the deal. Brits like to sneer at wild and wooly Americans, especially Texans. Could it be that their law is less comprehensive than ours?

The law requires that they make full disclosure.
Their bobbling and weaving are acts of a poseur.
They hide behind contracts to keep their stuff private,
But that’s a diversion, a way just to jive us.

When law provides that your data is public,
Contrary contracts don’t let you snub it.
Assassins with contracts still are just killers.
Crime is not lessened by crooks getting shriller.

To reply, email texthepontificator at yahoo dot com.

Labels: doggerel, global warming

Until recently one of my labels for posts was "war on terror." Reading leftist criticism of the war brought back to mind my earlier view that the phrase "war on terror" was probably chosen by the Bush administration for political reasons and was calculated to obscure what is really happening. What we are really doing is resisting an anti-western jihad by some elements of the Muslim world. For that reason, I shifted the label to "jihad."

I do not mean to criticize the Bush administration for the circumlocution. The government must balance many concerns. Calling resistance to jihad what it actually is may alienate potential allies in the Muslim world. At least the possibility seems logical, so I am willing to give Bush a pass for obfuscating what may be in the interests of the U.S. to obfuscate at least some of the time.

But I'm not the government and have no need to mince words. I believe calling things what they really are contributes to clarity of thought. Hence the "jihad" label.

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Labels: jihad

What has been dubbed "Climategate" continues to churn and has been the occasion to use the term "watermelon". Referring to people for whom environmentalism is a tool by which to put into effect leftist policy prescriptions, the term means green on the outside but red on the inside.

Their data are terribly flawed.
It all just might be a fraud.
They're just watermelons,
Perhaps even felons,
But their chutzpah we've got to applaud.

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Labels: doggerel, global warming

The hacked documents from East Anglia's Climate Research Unit increasingly make it appear that the anthropogenic warming advocates so intensely believed in their conclusions they felt justified in manufacturing data and suppressing contrary views. That is despicable, especially given how devastating some of their prescriptions could be.

The climate oil salesmen have fudged up their numbers,
But tell us we all should continue our slumbers.
Twas hardly discreet
To connive and to cheat.
They must think we're a bunch of cucumbers.

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Labels: doggerel, global warming

Watchdog.org reports that stimulus money went to 440 fictitious congressional districts, districts that do not exist. You would think that someone trying to hide graft would do a better job that that, but apparently you would be wrong.

At least $6.4 billion taxpayer dollars seems likely to have been stolen. I say "at least," because why would one assume that money was spent as advertised just because some staffer found a real congressional district number to peg it to?

The stimulus bucks would give us a boost;
That was the pitch we were sold,
But the grifters and con men quickly were loosed,
And now we find we were rolled.

Our money was sent to fictional places,
Districts that do not exist.
The usual suspects were off to the races,
And government graft still persists.

Our money now lines some rent seekers’ pockets,
And Congressmens’ probably too.
It’s lost in the ether just like a rocket,
And no one’s around we can sue.

Now here’s just one reason among many others
Why government needs to stand down.
It’s not looking after us as would our mothers;
If you believe that you’re beclowned.

It spends like a sailor with one night ashore;
It’s wastefulness always expands.
There’s never enough; it always needs more.
We’re left in the worst of all hands.

To reply, email texthepontificator at yahoo dot com.

Labels: Congress, doggerel, taxation, Tea Party

In the linked article, Mark Steyn rightly decries the unwillingness of many in the media and elsewhere to confront Islam's role in the murders perpetrated by U.S. Army Major Nidal Malik Hasan. That is a serious problem that, if we are to survive the Jihad being waged against us, we must overcome. Still while honestly confronting the threat radical Islam poses to our way of life, we must not regard all Muslims as enemies.

Western European countries have serious problems with their Muslim-immigrant populations. One reason is that. no matter what a Turk does, he can never be truly German, and no matter what an Algerian does, he can never be truly French.

Anyone can be an American. All you have to do is voluntarily integrate yourself into our culture and adopt our mores. I know that assimilation is anathema to the multi-culti crowd, but assimilation is how this country works. Assimilation isn't a question of whether you worship at a church or synagogue instead of a mosque. It's a question of accepting American ideals.

Nidal Malik Hasan was not assimilated and apparently did not want to be assimilated, even though he was born here. I am personally acquainted with Muslims who are well assimilated even though they were born elsewhere.

We must welcome all who want to be Americans, while still guarding against those who secretly harbor grievances against us or who, for religious reasons, feel compelled to bring us into dar al Islam. It will be difficult to be continuously vigilant of extremists while treating others fairly, but we must nevertheless do so.

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Labels: jihad

CNS News reports:

When asked by CNSNews.com what specific part of the Constitution authorizes Congress to mandate that individuals must purchase health insurance, Sen. Roland Burris (D-Ill.) pointed to the part of the Constitution that he says authorizes the federal government "to provide for the health, welfare and the defense of the country." In fact, the word "health" appears nowhere in the Constitution.

I wager Burris never before considered the constitutional foundation of Obamacare. It was enough for him that Democrats want the bill enacted.

Caligula sent a horse to the Senate,
But let’s give the monster a pass.
Burris doesn’t know the Constitution,
So Illinois sent a horse’s ass.

To reply, email texthepontificator at yahoo dot com.

Labels: Congress, doggerel, Obamacare

The BBC reports:

A bear killed two militants after discovering them in its den in Indian-administered Kashmir

An inspiration for doggerel if there ever was one:

If you’re a terrorist in Kashmir,
There’s one more thing for you to fear.
If you are hiding in a cave,
Averting danger's what you crave,
You’d better check on if you share
Your hideaway with a bear.

Rockets just might get you good,
And worry of them you clearly should.
Sharpshooting snipers are a danger,
But some risks are even stranger.
If you are careless, I’ve a hunch
That you might be what is for lunch

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Labels: doggerel, jihad

Charles Krauthammer's October 30 column discusses Obama's propensity, even this far into his administration, to blame all problems on George Bush. In so doing, he compare's Barack's behavior to an old Soviet joke. The joke presupposes that, as he lies on his death bed, Stalin calls in Nikita Khrushchev, who succeeded him:

"Niki, I'm dying. Don't have much to leave you. Just three envelopes. Open them, one at a time, when you get into big trouble."

A few years later, first crisis. Khrushchev opens envelope 1: "Blame everything on me. Uncle Joe."

A few years later, a really big crisis. Opens envelope 2: "Blame everything on me. Again. Good luck, Uncle Joe."

Third crisis. Opens envelope 3: "Prepare three envelopes."

Wouldn't you know that elicited some doggerel from me:

Unemployment’s through the roof.
They’re emptying out the vault,
But poor Obama stands aloof.
It’s Georgie Dubya’s fault.

The stimulus has blown the budget
And could lead to default.
Now poor Barack will have to fudge it.
It’s Georgie Dubya’s fault.

Afghanistan has gone to Hell,
Pull out or now assault?
How can Obama even tell?
It’s Georgie Dubya’s fault.

Obamacare will kill us quick
And government exalt,
And if you find that you get sick,
It’s Georgie Dubya’s fault.

Cap and trade will stultify
And make some go John Galt.
Let’s be just a teensy sly,
And say it’s Dubya’s fault.

The Left feels wounds from Dubya still,
So let’s get out some salt,
And rub it in their wounds until
They say it’s Dubya’s fault.

To reply, email texthepontificator at yahoo dot com.

Labels: Barack Obama, doggerel